Dignity and Grace

As of late I have been having a hard time completing some of these aquaculture projects at the work place….     When I have a hard time, I start getting fearful.  Fear shows me that something is wrong.  It is an uncomfortable experience, and I imagine it is an evolutionary reaction to, “make me do something about it.” 

Well, tomorrow is Monday.  The start of a new work week.   In any case, I am going to go to work and do my damnest to try and get these projects done.  Or atleast,  to do my job as best as I can.  I may not understand everything as a GS5, but it should all work out in the end hopefully.

So, my fear stems from losing my job.  I’ve become, not attached to my job, but to the money that I obtain from my job.  To that extent, I think I need to do things to eliminate that fear.  Having dignity and grace and confidence in my abilities, improving my skills, and diversifying the income… are all good ways.  So, when I go to work tomorrow, I’ll work as best as I can for those 8 hours.  I’ll be prepared.  And if I get fired,  then I will make sure that I have back up after back up.  When I quit the military, I increased my skill set and gained this career. 

Perhaps, if I ever got fired, it would be a good thing again like it was with the military.  I am much happier now.  I need to learn this Japanese though.  Not for just myself, but I do want to be a translator.  If I could learn to translate, then maybe I could learn how to make money with my translating.  And if I could find other opportunities to make money, then I wouldn’t be so afraid if I lost this job. 

I still haven’t heard word as to whether I will be in Seattle or Charleston.  Charleston is looking like it will be the case “at the moment”.  Hmm….. lets hope this all works out.